The Road to "Fit"
If you asked anyone who knew me growing up, they would tell you they aren't surprised I ended up being that girl on the stage. From a very young age I enjoyed finding ways to be in the spotlight, and this behaviour carried across academics, arts, and athletics. I was never a star athlete by any means, but I loved competing. Despite my enthusiasm, I went through my youth battling a slow metabolism with unhealthy eating habits. My weight fluctuated, dependent on whatever yo-yo diet my parents had joined that month. My parents intentions were good, however, misguided by their lack of knowledge and understanding of the relationship between physical activity and the foods we eat. The previous generation had based their diets on approaches of calorie restriction. This approach results in weight loss, but is often times unrealistically sustainable in the long run. By the time I graduated high school, I was eating 1100to1200 calories/day, low on energy, and big in the waist.
Fast-forward to my early twenties: married with a little girl and another on the way. I was unhappy with the results of my lengthy cardio sessions and my attempts at eating "healthy", according to popular literature. I ate 5km runs for breakfast, but could not achieve the six-pack that the magazines promised me! What was I doing wrong?! Magazines boasted pictures of moms bouncing back from pregnancy with washboard abs; headlines touting the cure-all diets, but nothing seemed to work for me. I knew there had to be a better approach. I was five months pregnant with my son when I stumbled upon an article featuring Gorgo Magazine's Editor in Chief Erica Willik. She was a successful professional who decided that she was tired of being "skinny-fat" after having her first child that she took on the daunting goal of competing in a fitness competition. I knew that these competitions had become quite popular in the last few years, but I had never considered it something that I could possibly achieve, yet here I was reading about a woman very similar to me that not only competed, but won! And she went on to make a career of it! It was from this moment on that I chose my goal and began a road to developing a new approach: one that fit my lifestyle, included my family, and ignited that old competitive fire within me to get my butt back on stage.
I had done all the research, found a coach with an approach I believed would help keep me going, discussed with her my goals, and set a plan to get myself stage ready within a year. I had my son April 15, 2014, and began training and diet May 18 of that same year. I started out lifting weights 4 times a week, and chose to keep my regular cardio routine of 5km a day, simply for my love of running. I enjoyed the weights. They made me feel empowered and strong. I would walk around the house flexing my non-existent biceps every time I passed the mirror, hoping each time they would be a little more defined. Each day, I chose to push myself to lift heavier, add one more rep. The goal was ever present in my mind. This was the fun part; the diet was hard.
What I had thought was "healthy" for years was far from the truth. I had to retrain my brain to understand that I required protein, fats and carbs to create the body I wanted. I didn't need to wittle down to 1200 calories a day, I needed to increase to 2200 calories a day! My fats and carbs suddenly became just as important as my protein shakes! I was beginning to curb my habits of late night popcorn and chocolate binges because I now saw them as a hinderance to my training, and not as a "cheat" that I should secretly eat in the kitchen when no one is looking. I worked my butt off, training my body and my mind for 12 straight months, eating way more chicken, fish and egg whites than I ever thought was possible, and I stepped on that stage in the best shape of my life; post-two-babies.
I don't have some Cinderella story that ends with my placing first. In fact, I didn't even place top 15. What I did do, however, was kick the old me to the curb. I made a personal best -I know, blah blah blah- but believe me when I say that it has taken me weeks to feel this good about that girl on stage. I crashed hard after, as the abs faded away, the water bloat happened, and I gained ten pounds from stage weight. I had to build myself back up. Piece by piece I reviewed what I had done to get there, and dug deep to find why I had done it all. It's because I actually loved it. I love the science behind eating to your macros. I loved including my friends in the process, and helping spur their love for it too. I loved that my family and I worked together to better ourselves, eat healthier, and get more active. It resulted in us having more energy to interact, spend less time on the couch and more time playing. That was why I loved it, and is why I am still doing it.
Will I compete again one day? Yes, absolutely! But I need to take some time where I work on just being healthy without a goal, and loving the body I have now. I have met some wonderful and amazing people through this process. They empower me and countless others to take up the bar and start living a healthier life with weights. They lift up women in their communities, and reach out to those that need the encouragement to keep going and/or get started. I want to be one of those women. That is why I have started this site: a community of women and mothers sharing their love and zest for a healthy life, in the hopes of inspiring those that are searching for a way. It is a place to connect, communicate your thoughts, share your recipes and workouts, and possibly lend a little love and encouragement to those that need it. Sometimes all we need is a helping hand and a light shove to get moving on the path towards our goals.
Strong women: may we be them; may we raise them; may we know them.